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A while back I posted a translation to the song “Sex Room” by that master of melodies Ludacris (He’s really giving Wagner a run for his money). That particular post has gotten a lot of attention. I think this is because everyone else was afraid to admit they didn’t know what the hell he was talking about. This time, I’ve taken the liberty of translating “My Chick Bad” which, as you’ll see, turns out to be very contradictory. There’s lots of harping on how awful his girlfriend is, but then how she’s great. I don’t get it. Enjoy nonetheless.

[Chorus]
My female companion is dubious
My female companion is of low economic means
Yet Mmy female companion is the envy of yours
[repeated]
My female companion is dubious, far more dubious than yours
My my female companion is dubious, far more dubious than yours
My my female companion is dubious, far more dubious than yours

[Ludacris – Verse 1]
What i’m trying to espouse here is that my girlfriend is not good
She is not well-to-do by any means
My female companion can do things yours merely dreams of
Yet my female companion is many times worse than yours
My girlfriend, she does things I struggle to articulate
Her pompousness knows no boundaries
Her body will not surrender
So silence yourself, dolt. You know not of what you speak.
My female companion, do tell if you have laid eyes on her
She always brings sporting equipment like prominent tennis players
Both her top and her belt are of matching hues (white).
With all white jeans, her body resembles a dairy product
She has no time to toy with you, as she is an adult
My female companion is dubious, ergo, you can tell yours to vacate these premises.

[Chorus]

[Ludacris – Verse 2]
Now your female companion may be ill but mine is ailing faster
She fornicates openly and can consume massive amounts of liquor without becoming sick
She will render your female companion unconscious and proceed to scuffle
She strikes much like Elin Nordegren, the famous Swedish super model
Yes, she can be a tad rapid in her methods
Other females would be wise to cover their bosoms
She has numerous female comrades, all with questionable mental stability
They march much like participants in the Macy’s Thanksgiving day parade
I inflate balloons for her as if she were a small child
This is to test her cognitive dissonance before drawing my weapon
I am not,however, referring to Homer Simpson
This girl is so dastardly, my entire posse wants to partake in sex acts with her

[Chorus]

[Nicki Minaj]
Yo, now all sorts of females want to become my kindred spirit
But I take evasive maneuvers with them
I insult them thoroughly and fit them inside a garbage bag
I run as if I’m engaged in a WMBA game
On Friday the 13th, inside my basement, we’ll be reenacting the horror film of the same name
Get into bed and grasp a stuffed animal tightly
In nightmare on Elm Street, the character of Freddy was played by sir Robert Englund
(My female companion is dubious)
When chefs cook for me, they all tell me my footwear needs to be institutionalized
The mental Asylum is looking for me
You are clearly a novice
I’m in in some sort of purple device of my own making. Woman, you are quite a fan.

[Chorus]

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